What I learned from Ashley's graduation

My brilliant, amazing, hot and pregnant wife graduated from Willamette University with her Master's in Education yesterday.  Quite the accomplishment!  In so many ways I am proud of her.  And I am so happy I was able to attend the ceremony because the commencement speaker really caught my attention.  Dr. Frank Serafini was his name. I had no idea who he was - turns out he is a very decorated individual in his arena of teaching - but I will tell you what he said made a whole lot of sense to me, teacher or not.  I took some notes.  After all, I was in a room full of teachers!

                              "Don't try to make lifelong learners and readers by making them do unrealistic things that lifelong learners and readers don't do!"
His example of this was pretty funny.  He asked the audience if we, after we are done reading a book, go get a shoe box and make a timeline of events of our favorite characters.  The answer is no!  So why do teachers make their kids do some of these (in his eyes) ridiculous things?  His answer to making lifelong learners and readers is to engage them in interesting and relevant activities and conversations that make them live it, not just memorize or imitate it.

                           "Advice is cheap. Wisdom comes from years and reflection".
I like this.  He understands how wisdom comes from looking inside yourself and reflecting on what made you who you are.  He warned the graduates to not just take advice from passersby, but to engage in wisdom-filled conversations and relationships.  Right on, brother!

                           "When you have a day where things just don't go your way, leave early and go wine tasting! (for those under 21, go play kick ball)"
He puts life in perspective.  Serafini warned the teachers not to take it too seriously or else they will get buried.  He is big on having fun, for sure, but also compartmentalizing his life.  He's a teacher.  But he's also someone who lives life outside of work to it's fullest, and in his eyes THAT is what is most important.

                            "The more interesting you become as a person, the more interesting a leader   you'll be".
I think this is my favorite of all of his statements.  How will anyone want to learn from you or follow you if you are a boring dud?  Frank says to teach yourself to become interesting and curious.  Read outside of your comfort zone.  Travel a lot.  Have real, deep relationships with people outside of your work community.  Go wine tasting or play kick ball.  Become interesting! I love this.

 Needless to say, I subscribe to Sefafini's way of thinking.  He gets it.  He understands what it takes to be a great teacher is to become interesting, to change your curriculum yearly, to engage kids IN the battle of learning, not to simply talk at them.  Frank was inspiring to me.  I can apply so much of what he says in my line of work and I will for sure!

So what do you say?  How are you going to become a more interesting person?  Until next time, learn something new and take a change.  You'll be more interesting because of it!

It's baby time.

A little while back I received a Facebook message from my friend Harry.  At first, it seemed pretty funny.  Actually, it still is funny, but now as Baby Casebeer is getting closer and closer I am realizing some of this stuff he said is true, or will be true!  Here it is:

"Alex Congrats on the new baby boy, because you are now going to be a Father you are immediately granted with the following Man-Characteristics.
1. You automatically have Fatherly wisdom in all aspects of life (Great Responsibility).
2. You automatically have old man strength regardless of age.
3. You automatically are the encyclopedia of all things regarding scotch, cigars, shaving, and boat fuel.
4. You have been looked up to, now you are automatically looked up to by wife and child."

Ok so some things in here definitely ring true. 

Number 2.  I am still working on this.  But definitely know about this alleged old man strength.  I've seen it in action before in older men.  It's impressive.

Number 3.  Ok I like cigars and shaving.  I'm working my way into being a scotch drinker, so give me some time on that.  Boat fuel?  Well I like riding in boats and don't know anything or care about the fuel that goes in.  BUT! I'll pretend like I know anything.

Number 1.  I accept the fact that I will at some point have wisdom in life.  And it is a huge responsibility!  But for now I'm just trying to figure this life out one day at a time, letting Jesus take the lead.

Number 4.  Ok this one scares me a little big.  While I do realize that once I got married, I was in a position of leadership.  My wife looks to me for decisions and at times guidance.  Now I will have a child looking for those same things!  Wow, this is huge.  And you know what?  I can't wait!

I recently read a great article on one man's take on parenting.  It goes along with a book I read also, so I am beginning to think there is a trend here.  Take a look at this quote from the article:
            
            "We can no longer guide our children by dictatorial or condescending lectures. They are not listening, but they are watching, and thus, like it or not, we must come to grip with the inescapable fact that the way we live our own life is the only appropriate influence we have on our children's lives. No lectures; no discussion; just do it. Just be it."

I love this quote on all levels.  Here is a guy who realizes that he is in a distinct position to lead his kids.  He understands that lectures aren't going to get it done, but that actions will.  Leading a life of whimsy and adventure (with integrity) will show them what it's all about.  And THAT is the part about parenting that I am looking forward to.

So September 2 this adventure begins.  Sure there will be sleepless nights in the beginning.  But who cares?  I want there to be sleepless nights later in life with them because we are out doing something crazy.  If you have any other advice, let me know!  I'm all ears.

Until next time, no more lectures.  Just go out and be it!

Lessons from the Auto Business

So I went to a sales training meeting today and figured it would be just like any other sales training meeting: energetic but the "same ol same ol".  It can be stale, boring, and viewed as a waste of time.  As a manager, I know that any training is, for the most part, good training.  But today's was a little different.  Here is what I learned.

You have to become a little uncomfortable to bring change. You see, we are going through a change in the way we sell cars.  We hate putting customers in a position of perceived pressure.  So we are changing.  We don't want it to be that difficult to buy cars, it shouldn't be!  We are changing the way we are doing things but change is difficult.  Change is messy but in the end change is good.  This concept also sounds a lot like life to me.  We are resistant to change, in general.  And when we do need to change something in our lives, it is uncomfortable.  We need to embrace that!  You have to become a little uncomfortable to bring change.

Make a big deal out of the small things.  Sometimes we (in the car business) overlook the seemingly unimportant things.  We are around cars all day, every day.  I realize that this car has 9 airbags, but how much does that matter, right?  This is a small thing to us, but can be a huge thing to a customer.  And we need to make these small things big!  We need to emphasize them.  I think in life we overlook the small things, too.  The old adage of "Stop and smell the roses" rings in my ears.  I think we tend to overlook the small things in our daily routine.  We forget to tell people we love them as much as we should.  We rush around possibly missing something amazing in creation.  But what I think is important is that every once in a while we should make a huge deal out of small things.  You never know who's day - or life - you might change.

Your attitude creates the perception.  Simple, but true.  My sales guys will never sell anything if they don't have a great attitude, all the time.  Once you have a positive attitude, you create energy.  Energy creates enthusiasm.  Enthusiasm creates an event that you will never forget.  That's exactly what we are going for here at my work - to create a customer experience like no other one in the business.  But you know what?  I believe the same thing about life too.  Attitude leads us down all sorts of paths that can become unforgettable - good or bad!  But we wake up every single day and have a choice: good attitude or bad attitude.  What is your choice going to be?  Your attitude determines almost every thing you do!

This is truly about relationships.  This business, in the end, isn't really about price, trade in value, or interest rates.  It isn't about thinking you scored or got taken advantage of.  It is about relationships.  I am in the distinct position of having the opportunity to be in this business for a long time, and possibly own it.  I know first hand that relationships matter.  We sell a car one day.  But if we treat that customer right, they will hopefully be a life long customer.  Our sales people don't necessarily realize that because they come and go, they don't care as much as I do.  But I am teaching them to.  I am teaching them that relationships matter and are crucial.  Treating people right is all that really matters.  Sounds like life right?  Sounds like Jesus too, to me.  Jesus is really only about relationships.  He just wants to be with us and us with Him.

The thing about the car business and life is that at times things can be applied here and there interchangeably.  I look for these things daily and more and more am finding out just how much I like this business.  I like the challenge of it and I love the challenge God has laid out for me.  Now I just have to take advantage and listen to Him.

Until next time, attitude, relationships, and small things.  What are you going to learn today?

Yo, Momma!

She was there on October 17, 1982 (when we gave birth to me!).   She was there when I broke my arm jumping over a couch in our basement and was there when I sliced open my hand opening the dog food can.  (ER, both times).  She was there when I crapped my pants countless times.  She was there when my beloved frog, Slimer, died.  She took me to every single modeling shoot I had as a kid and sat there for hours on end.  (I think she kept all the money.  But she deserved it!) 

She was there thru the awkward stage of my youth - braces, headgear, short shorts and high socks - and told me I looked good despite the fact that I was (still am) a huge dork.  She took me to middle school jazz band (even through I was in elementary school) at 6:15am every morning.  She let me play golf all day long and charge egregious amounts of food on the tab at Illahe.  She drove me from Salem to Klamath Falls, up the Oregon Coast and back to Salem for 2 golf tournaments to watch me play like garbage.  She flew to Colorado when I qualified for a big one because she didn't want to miss a step.  She flew to Hawaii to watch my brother and I compete in a music competition for 3 days (OK, not too impressed with that one...).  She has proved that she will truly go to the end of the earth for me.

She didn't let me to to AC/DC because George Carter fell through our ceiling while climbing around where we shouldn't have.  She taught me discipline on that one.  She buried my cat Karen in the front yard (had to fold her tail in half to make her fit in our man made grave...).  She cooked for and fed hungry teenagers just about every night of the summer for years on end.  She has short-sheeted my bed numerous times.  She went through the worst time of her life with just me, and made it out a better person.  Through that, she taught me how to grow up, love when it's ugly, and keep you eye on the positive things.  She took me on trips, just the two of us, until the year I was married.  I will forever cherish the Mom-and-me trips and hope I get at least one more!  Heck I hope I get like 10 more, she pays!

She taught kids how to play piano, how to sing and how to have fun in church choir.  She has impacted thousands of lives in Salem through her volunteering and time spent in the community.  She laughs a lot.  She kicks ass on the tennis court and runs marathons.  She is now a grandma.  She still cooks the best cookies and banana bread.

It's May 13, 2012 and she's enjoying life as wife, friend, grandma and mom. 

She's MY mom, and for that, I am so thankful.  Happy Mother's Day, I love you, Mom!

Morning musings.

Have you ever wanted a relationship with someone?  I'm not talking romantically.  I'm talking about maybe someone you've idolized from a distance, or think is really cool, or is new in town?  I know I have.  And sometimes when it doesn't work out, I  get a little disappointed.  But sometimes it does work out and it turns in to something really amazing and fruitful.  All it takes is a little persistence and sticking your neck out there.

There is a story in the Bible about a guy who was in this exact position.  He was someone who was not liked in his home town - he was the dreaded tax collector whom everyone didn't trust or like at all.  Well Zacchaeus heard that Jesus was coming to town and wanted to meet him.  In Luke 19:2 it says that he was "wanting to see what sort of person Jesus was".  You see, he idolized Jesus from a distance.  Zac wanted to know about Him, what His life was like, and who He was.  Jesus rolls in to town and Zac climbs a tree to get a look at Him, thinking Jesus wouldn't realize he was up there.  Well Jesus is Jesus and He knew. He could feel that someone wanted to know Him.

So what does Jesus do?  He stops everything and invites Himself over to Zac's house for dinner.  All Jesus wanted to do was strike up a relationship with Zac and get to know him.  On his turf.  In his kitchen.  Over his dinner table. You see, Jesus is consistent.  He comes in to our lives and does the same thing.  He never forces him self on us and says that in order to know Him we have to go to church or be a missionary or go to Catholic school.  He just says "let's hang out every day and do stuff together".  He wants to go through this life with us, not above us.  Jesus just wants to be with.

My question to myself while I was reading this was two-fold.  I asked myself that if Zacchaeus wanted to know what kind of person Jesus is and I was living in his time, am I showing him with my life who Jesus is?  That struck a chord.  Am I living out what Jesus wants me to be as His follower and friend or am I doing my own thing?  Would Zac know who Jesus was if he met me?

I also asked myself, Am I walking through life, doing stuff, with Jesus everyday?  Or do I just invite Him to certain things?  You see, Jesus wants to be a part and THE part of everything!  He doesn't care.  He just wants to be with us and do stuff.  All of our stuff.  Not just the stuff that we want Him to see or know about.  I mean, come on.  He's God and knows about it anyway, so why try to hide??  Just let it all hang out and let Jesus in on the inside.

Lots to think about for me on this one.  Lots to do about it.  What about you?  Until next time, don't be afraid to seek out a new relationship.  You never know where it might lead you.